I don’t really think we have time for a handjob, Joe.
The older I get, the more sure I become that humanity is devolving. I can only assume that Idiocracy is actually a “futurementary”: a documentary to warn humanity about the dangers of what lies ahead if we continue on our current trajectory.
I have recently been stunned by what we in the technology field choose to spend our time doing and what investors insist upon funding. A recent application received $1.5 million for doing less than current messaging applications. That’s right: an application that does nothing except send a one word message to your friends has raised $1.5 million. The New York Times piece links to a press release announcement from Blonde 2.0 (the self proclaimed world’s leader of digital marketing) which is riddled with mindless drivel that attempts to glorify one of the single worst ideas I’ve ever heard. The press release refers to Yo as “[an] incredibly simple communications app”. The application, as it stands today, literally allows you to send “Yo” to your friends or family. Are you fucking kidding me?
The New York Times piece quotes John Borthwick, the Chief Executive of Betaworks (an early backer of Yo), as saying,
We are fascinated by these uses of simple yes/no on/off communications tools. There is no payload in Yo — no pictures, no text, just a deceptively simple on/off state that over time has the potential to become a platform.
I hate to burst your bubble, but there is nothing “deceptively simple” about this platform or this application. I am not stupid. I fucking realize how simple this entire idea is. I’m just at a loss for words that the equivalent of a Facebook poke is being invested in so heavily. It’s shit like this that makes me embarrassed to tell people that I write software.